Lipstick & Danger

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Wacky Thankful List

So many people on Facebook are posting their thankful lists. I haven’t done that. The people that (including me) read the lists really aren’t aware of many of the things they’re talking about. Their loved ones know and shouldn’t they be telling those people in person instead of me? Just a thought. So I’m going to publish a few things I’m thankful for that might interest you.

1. That extra 20 pounds I’ve been carrying around. Aunt Peggy says you need it in case you get sick. I’m good for a couple of serious illnesses I think.

2.  My bum knee. I’m pretty good at predicting the weather thank you very much.

3.  My fear of heights. This one gets me out of gutter duty, getting on a ladder to paint and hang pictures. The hubby gladly takes over for me. He used to think I was faking until I had a meltdown in front of him.

4.  I’m thankful I don’t like clowns. They’re annoying and strange. I feel it’s my duty not to encourage that kind of behavior. My family gets a lot of laughs trying to scare me with clown stories or finding silly cards with clowns on them. The truth is I’m not scared of them. I just don’t like them. But I’m not going to tell my family because they enjoy it so much.

5.  I’m thankful for my sister-in-law who would make a great dictator for a third world nation. When she comes to my house for Thanksgiving she takes over my kitchen and bosses us into getting the job done. No stress for me and she gets the satisfaction of being in charge.

6.  I’m also very thankful for my brother who keeps me awake at night with his conspiracy theories. As a writer I need that kind of paranoia to write the next novel. I also appreciate his research into our family history proving that at some point in time we really did crawl out from under a rock.

And there you have my Thanksgiving list. No tears or blessings galore. If you know me you already know how great my life is and how much I appreciate it. But I’m sure you didn’t know any of the above list. Isn’t that a lot more fun?

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